Reading Is Hazardous

After a brief hiatus from playing outside I am a much happier person after my trail run this morning. The rain went away and I voluntarily got out of bed at 7 because I needed some sunshine to burn the grumpy off of me.

I did a slow 4.5 miles, avoided chunks of falling bridges raining from the sky and was glad to be outside.

I have a mile on roads to get to and from the park where I do most of my running. Certainly not far enough to drive to the park. This morning I was about a quarter of a mile from home. The light was red as I approached an intersection so I danced around on the sidewalk trying to stay warm waiting for the light to turn. Green came, I looked both ways like my mommy said I should always do, ran off the curb and started to cross the street.

Then,

BOOKMOBILE! ON MY PERSON!

Like, a giant vehicle with books in it, clearly labeled with the Philadelphia library logo.

It blew by me, so close that my arms hit the driver’s side door as I slammed to a stop and tried to protect my brain with my hands.

Apparently bookmobiles are allowed to blow through red lights and turn left on red. The driver almost ran me over as cars from the opposite direction slammed to a stop to avoid a hot mess.

I. Lost. My. Shit.

Have you ever seen a bookmobile get told to go eff itself? Repeatedly? Followed by the bookmobile being told to go home and do dirty things with its mother? Repeatedly? If you were at the intersection of Walnut and Greene at 8:06 this morning you did.

A few seconds later I stopped being The Incredible Hulk and continued home.

When I got home, though, I was still feeling a little bit stabby. I seriously considered calling the library to complain. I am not making this up. I wish I was.

“Hi. Is this the library? You should know you have a (fill in your favorite obscenities here) driving your bookmobile. Goodbye."                                           

Instead, I have decided to boycott reading. That will show the bookmobile.

Seriously, is the mile between my front door and Wissahickon Park trying to kill me? Do I actually need to wear a helmet at all times?